Friday, 25 December 2009

So utterly distracted...

You know that level of horniness, where to focus on a single task seems impossible, where you feel that hot, tingling, hunger, just there... I know that feeling. I have that feeling right now.
Now, I am delighted that this year is easily one of my best christmasses ever. Probably the best since childhood. Not that we did anything special, just that I felt good, and happy. [By the way, the meds I told you about in the last post? They've been upped and it's the most amazing thing ever, all that crap I've felt since I was a kid is just gone. Really. It's almost scary how wonderful I feel.]
Which is nice. The only downside to the festivities is that the Mr and I each went off to our respective parents, and have spent the last couple of nights in different towns, let alone different beds. That sucks, I miss him, soppy as that is. But I have to admit, today that has really... deepened, shall we say.
I'm at that stage of really, physically, hungering for him. Needing him, all of him.
I need to feel his touch, feel his lips on mine, his tongue to dance over my own, and gloss over my nipples, hardening them. I need to be aware of his cock growing hard, not quite at that moment but the presence... I need to feel his fingers push into my wetness, twisting and probing me, making me writhe uncontrollably. I need to feel his breath on my clit, and for him to lick and suck me to orgasm while his fingers explore my ass. To run my tongue down the length of his shaft, then take him into my mouth, and lube my ass with my fingers. I need to turn and offer my moistened asshole to him, and feel him push deep inside of me, fucking me wildly, till he fills my ass with hot cum...
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
[file this entry under self torture, why dontcha?]
LF x

Friday, 27 November 2009

Life etc...

Ok then. So, I've toyed with the idea of this post for a few days now and decided to go ahead with it. I guess some of that deliberation is about where my boundaries lie on here, and whether anyone cares about my personal life. Still though, I decided to procede on the basis that what's going on right now affects my life fairly significantly and can also affect my blogging up to a point. (Enough rambling, yes?) Basically, I've had depression problems since my teens at least, if not 11/12, and now I'm at Uni they have returned again. I'm finding myself extremely anxious, paranoid about people around me, and a whole host of other depressive stuff too. This came to a head a few weeks back when I had a group presentation to do at Uni and I just couldn't speak no matter how hard I tried. I'm also aware there are times when I'm a really shitty girlfriend (though I know my boyfriend says I'm not) and a really shitty housemate. I did go see my doctor, though I felt bad for wasting her time, I didn't think she could do much etc. I was expecting the same as I got a couple years back with my old doc, a laminated tick sheet to almost self-diagnose, and a promise of some CBT with what was probably the worlds crappiest CPN ever that never did materialise. I actually feel guilty for underestimating my GP now, she was wonderful. We had a really good talk, she takes my problems seriously and is referring me for therapy, and I've been started on some antidepressant/anti-anxiety meds too. Probably overdue by all accounts. Now, how this ties into the blog, aside from the fact that there is a person (me!) writing it, and this is happening to me, is the fact of side effects of ADs. Now, like most ADs, there are a list of possible side effects about as long as my arm. I'm being affected by a few, most notable is the nausea which happens most days at the moment, but with extra tiredness in there somewhere, oh, and... increased difficulty in achieving orgasm. Now this last one I'll admit I've taken kinda hard. Don't get me wrong, I'm sticking with the meds, it's not really an option to ditch them cold turkey anyway, and I think long term this is the best way to go, but this one side effect is probably the one that's getting to me the most. Being a girl who, since I started self-pleasuring some 10 or more years ago, has never had trouble getting off, to have to work so hard is sort of alien to me. On the bright side, I guess it gives me a chance to really road-test the Tracey Cox Orgasm Arousal Gel I have and already really like. Clouds and silver linings and all that! Anyway, I really hope I haven't bored you or annoyed you too much. I'll keep this kind of boring crap to a minimum, I promise.

NK x

Thursday, 5 November 2009

Review: California Exotics - iTap "G" Vibe

The uber-observant types out there may have noticed a rather pink box that appeared to the right recently; yes, the gorgeous guys & girls at CalExotics added me to their ever growing band of Sexperts! Yesterday I got my first toy from them to review, and I was pretty pleased to have been sent the iTap™ "G" Vibe (in white).

I'd had my eye on the iTap range for a little while; the standout feature (as may be given away by the name) is the way in which they're operated - there are no buttons on this baby! No dials or rocker switches, or anything similar.

The base is touch sensitive, so you just "tap" and go, so to speak! I liked this idea when I first heard about it, as in the heat of the moment a lot of buttons can be fiddly, and I don't have much luck with dials to be honest. The iTap range has other styles of vibe in it, such as eggs, wands and bullets (Click to see the entire iTap range) but in all honesty, I was glad to get the G vibe. I'm on a bit of an ongoing quest to find the perfect G spot vibe and I'm always up for trying another one!

When I first took it out of the box, I noticed the angle the G spot curve is at feels a lot more dramatic than many others, which I took to be a positive thing, I've not had much success with some other 'gspot' toys so I don't think the 'softly softly' approach works with me! The vibe itself feels velvety soft, thanks apparently to CalExotics "Velvet Cote" er... coating! Anyway, it feels really silky, just gorgeous. It's average length at 6" and fairly slim at 1", which is a reasonable size given that it feels more due to the curvature. Cycling through the options, I found 5 settings that can be ran through, though I must admit I spent more time on the first, lowest setting, than any other.

On the lowest setting it's fairly quiet, but as it gets to the higher setting or pulsing/escalating settings it's more noticable. I'd say the volume's about average though, and nothing a TV/radio couldn't drown out - but perhaps not one for times when you need to be very discrete. Given that though, it probably wouldn't matter if it was the quietest vibe in the world, I still wouldn't use this if I had to be very quiet... I don't think I could keep quiet if I tried!

My initial thoughts on the angle of the head proved fairly accurate - that feels divine rubbing against the gspot, and I really noticed the difference the coating made. Considering it only takes 2 AA batteries, it really packs a punch! Like I said, I spent a great deal of time on the mildest setting, and found that plenty strong enough. It has a great deal of versatility too, I used it for clit stimulation and found it worked brilliantly for that too.

My only major gripe with the iTap "G" Vibe is that in order to turn it off, you have to cycle through all the 5 settings. Not so bad if you're on the last, or second-to-last one, but if you've been hovering around the first one, that takes some tapping! Another small potential issue I considered was the probability of accidentally 'tapping' to the next setting when you didn't mean to, as the touch sensitive pad on the base is quite sensitive (about as sensitive as my phone's touch screen, if that contextualises what I mean?) - however I think both these issues are a small trade off for doing away with dials and buttons, and for gaining such simplicity.

  • Excellent G-Spot stimulation from the angled head
  • Velvety-soft feel
  • Runs on widely available AAs
  • Good strong vibrations
  • Much less fiddly than other vibes; touch sensitive base

  • Having to cycle through all settings to switch off
  • Potential to slip and skip through settings
The issues are small enough to easily overlooked, and the returns ROCK. Easily the best G-Spot vibe I've enjoyed, and one I will be using time and time again. P.S. It's just technical-sounding enough to make any guy want to have a go ("touch sensitive pad you say, oh... interesting" will be the words you'll likely hear) - and if there is one thing better than a damn good vibrator, it's a damn good vibrator in the hands of someone else, doing the work!

 
A single point lost due to minor 'cons' - otherwise outstanding!
 
View all the info for the "G" vibe or the entire iTap Range @ CalExotics' website, UK readers may wish to buy @ Lovehoney for £22.99 (price correct as of writing)

NK x

Thursday, 15 October 2009

Just a quickie... About as close to HNT as I'll likely ever get!

So yeah... I bought something new! Look away now if BBW-ness ain't your thing!

Sorry for the pic quality!

NK x

Monday, 12 October 2009

I told you a revolution was coming...

And I didn't lie! As of this morning, this went live @ LoveHoney:
LoveHoney Sqweel
In what has to be one of the most hyped sex toy launches ever, I was lucky enough to be given a sneak preview of the Sqweel, getting to roadtest one a litLtle while ago - thanks of course, go out to the gorgeous folk at LoveHoney! So, what do I think? Well my first thoughts were on the packaging I saw as I opened it, the box is really cool (see below) and it's almost a pity LoveHoney is exclusively online, these would look fantastic on the shelves! Opening it up, I have to say I was surprised - it looks a lot different to anything out there at the moment... a claim I'd originally been mildly sceptical of when I first heard it - I didn't think there was much, if anything, that hadn't already been done in the market. I'm rather glad to say I was proven wrong in that respect!
So, on to the toy itself. As you can see, its all based on the idea of a wheel with 10 tongues on it, which rotates at variable speeds to simulate the sensation of oral sex on your clitoris - though it can be used elsewhere! There's just one control to switch it on and off, and to adjust the speed, so it's nice and simple, meaning you can just lie back and enjoy it instead of thinking about button pressing! The only mildly fiddly thing about the whole toy in fact, is the cover you twist off to clean it (and by the way, it's super easy to clean!) but after you've done that once, it's fine. I don't know if it's as obvious in the photos, but it's not obvious at all what it is when the cap is on - to that end, if it were left out on a side table and someone saw it, they wouldn't immediately guess it was a sex toy (so pretty handy for nosey relatives/friends/etc). It's also on the mild-moderate side of volume, and the little noise it does make isn't the typical "buzzy" noise, so again a little more discrete.
Ultimately though, how good a toy is really comes down to its performance... I was blown away! I have to admit I do normally have to give most toys a hand to get 'there', but with this, it did all the work for me! I wouldn't say it'd get me there the quickest out of anything i've tried, but it will give me the best orgasm, and certainly more like an orgasm with a partner. Now, conceptually, I can't help but think this is brilliant - like I said at the start of this post I wasn't convinced that there really was anything left that hadn't been done in the market, but this isn't like anything else out there. You can replicate sex - up to a point - with toys, but there has never been a good oral simulator on the market, especially at a reasonable price.
I honestly believe that if enough women find out about this, it could be as revolutionary - if not more so - to the market as the Rabbit!
Buy it exclusively @ LoveHoney for £34.99 (price correct at time of writing)

NK x

Saturday, 10 October 2009

Monday is so close...

And I am legitimately very excited about something that is happening then. Something big is coming. A revolution, even. And my review of it should live on launchday @ LoveHoney, as well as right here on my blog!
   

NK x

P.S. I've been sworn to secrecy till then, so no prodding me cause I didn't tell you enough! :P All shall be revealed oh-so-soon, dearest reader! <3 P.P.S I bought a corset top today. Can't wait for it to arrive, and hope it fits. I might even show you it. By the way, it's black PVC. ;)

Wednesday, 23 September 2009

New Lustings.

I do love the What's New section of LoveHoney. I generally have a look at it every couple of weekdays just to keep up to date with what's around, and to see if there is anything that must be added to the Wishlist asap! ;) I thought I'd post a little round up of the latest additions that I personally, find intriguing and have a bit of a natter about them! Inked Vibes from Cal Exotics: I saw these a little while ago on an international site and had hoped that LoveHoney would get them in! I'm not exactly sold on the pink one, but I've found myself torn between the white or black options... This is a vibrator that I can admit I am buying purely on aesthetics, I don't think they look like they offer anything especially new and different in terms of functionality, but they're just damned gorgeous! Vibes with tatts? It's totally up my street, and in all honesty if I'm playing with a toy that looks like Kat Von D's, all the better for it! Doc Johnson Discreet Desires: Now, my first thought when I saw this - and indeed the reason I've chosen to mention it - is the resemblance it bears, in my opinion, to the Fun Factory LAYAspot. That toy was discontinued at LH a little while ago, though. The main difference I noticed was the raised little bumps on the 'business end' of the toy - I'm not sure what they add to the functionality and I'm also not certain if the operations of the toy are similar or not, but the shape in general is very similar. I did think it looked a little more plasticky, though the white and pink colourway much less so. Definately curious about this one though, as to whether it is just the Laya by a different brand? Now, something else that confused me: Toy Covers Non Lubricated Vibrator Sleeves: The reason I say that these confuse me is this; what's wrong with a condom? We've been told for years now that if we're sharing toys or going from anal play to vaginal use with a toy, to condom it... Now, most people have condoms, and the price has improved dramatically over the years. Granted they're not perfect, but I don't entirely understand what the proposition of these is - an improvement on condoms? I'm guessing a better fit for vibes, which is good and all, but I wonder if the concept isn't possibly a little counterproductive - in that it could steer people away from seeing condoms as routine with shared toys? I don't know, maybe I'm reading way too much into this. Yeah, probably... Still though, if someone does know what the enhanced features of these are, please do comment, as I'm not being sarcastic here, I'm legitimately puzzled! Finally, on to something a bit more 'out there'- Belladonna's Magic Hand (also by Doc Johnson): Like I said, a little more 'out there'. For me at least. For a long time now, I've held a quiet curiosity about fisting, or rather being fisted. I have to state at this point that I do mean this in a vaginal sense, not an anal sense... (though never say never and all that..!) Thing is though, that I have quite big hands, as does my boyfriend. I've never been totally sure how many fingers he's had inside of me before, though there have been times when it's felt like quite a lot... Yeah, I know, kinda lame to not ask I suppose. Still though, I know I've gotten fairly far during solo play but these damn man-hands of mine interfere with that! So this is oh so tempting! The one thing that puts me off is that, well... it's creepy. A severed arm in my toy drawer? Hmm. Come to think of it, do i think of my dildos as being severed penises? Maybe the logic falls down there. I do find the arm creepy though.

NK x

Monday, 7 September 2009

How sexy is your town?

I've been looking forward to the results of the UK Sex Map being published for a while now, since I first heard of the map being compiled. For me, interesting results include: The city I live in right now spends more than the national average on toys and naughty accessories (well done!). The things my city spends the most on (at 1.4x the national average) are Adult DVDs and Sexy Costumes. The town I was born and raised in is in the top 50! Apparently, it spends over three times the national average on anal toys! It's also pretty good to see that the folks of my home town aree being as safe as possible, with 2.6x the national average being spent on condoms. The map has already been featured in a few newspapers today, but more interestingly, there is an edition of Company magazine coming out soon... that may have a not-so-familliar face in it... See if you can spot me by the answers! ;) Why not have a flick through and see what your town gets up to?!

NK x

Monday, 31 August 2009

I've been gone too long.. /sigh.

Okay so this post isn't anything too crazy-exciting I'm afraid!

More so that I'm conscious of how long I've been away, I'm missing nattering and I wanted to reassure you guys that I am very muchly still in the land of the living! The first thing that's kept me away from you all is that I've been ill.

I got what felt a lot like flu but then developed into tonsilitis. It was a really nasty dose too, and I'm still on antibollocks, sorry, antibiotics, for it now. As recently as Tuesday I could barely breathe due to my throat trying to close up on me. It really sucked! Chocolate got me through, I depended on it for a good few days to keep my energy up enough when I couldnt swallow any food!

Aside from that, a lack of get up and go in the bedroom hasn't immensely helped the blog of late - but a whole heap of that has been bad timing, one thing and another then a bout of illness where kissing is actually prohibited! Does very little for the sex life!

 However, Friday just gone was a special day for us. It marked one whole year that we've officially been a couple <3 That was pretty huge for me, to be honest. It sounds corny as hell to say it, but I really do love him even more now than I did back then. Back on the sex and sex toy theme, I want to give a quick shout out to Mantric who I think rock. All shall be revealed why soon enough, but if you want to see what they have out right now, I'd suggest LoveHoney!

NK x

Friday, 7 August 2009

Review: Evolved Novelties - True Love "Amore" Vibrator

Hi guys! I've been promising a review for a while now, and I still haven't delivered! This is a sort-of compromise... I have previously reviewed this product but I've been wanting to provide enhanced reviews on the blog for a little while so I guess this is my test run as it were! Kind thanks go out to LoveHoney, who were cool enough to ask me to test this!
True Love: AMORE vibrator by Evolved Novelties
The first thing that really hit me about this toy was the packaging; it is (in my opinion) the best packaged toy I've had the pleasure of owning!
It comes in a tin which clips shut with a window to show the vibrator, and doesn't scream "SEX TOY" like so many do - the packaging really is about as classy as you could imagine for any toy.
The company website (http://www.evolvednovelties.com) states that "the packaging serves as a secure, hygienic and discreet carrying case – including, a clever insert that actually conceals the toy!" which I agree with, it makes for an excellent case to store the toy in. (In case it's not something you've come across before, toys should be isolated with one another to prevent materials from reacting.)
There is just the one button and three speeds which can be cycled through - low, medium and high. I found the medium speed to be the most enjoyable for me and I normally like relatively strong vibrations. What's great about this is the simplicity of operation, which in the heat of the moment is pretty damn important, however it does lead to needing to cycle through to switch off.
I enjoyed the shape of the vibe as it is quite different to the straight up-and-down of the vast majority you can buy. The curves of the vibrator allow for extra stimulation without feeling "ridged" like some do. As usual, I did need a little clit stimulation to get there, but I wouldn't blame the toy for that as that is quite normal for me.
It doesn't look especially big on the girth size, but feels more than it looks, so lube might be a good idea for for newer users. This felt like more of an issue when I used the toy solo, which adds to my lube suggestion, it goes without saying that I'm more turned on when in the sack with him than alone, and I did also find that I found the toy more pleasurable when he used it on me. I'm not sure if that was simply due to being extra turned on, or if he got a better angle with it.
  • The packaging is just too gorgeous. It makes for an excellent storage box.
  • The feel is great, nice and solid but with a jelly outer.
  • It's also totally skin safe, and phthalates free!

  • It's not the quietest vibe I've used, but equally, it's not exactly rabbit-volume either.
  • Cycling through the options to get it to switch off could be an issue if you suddenly need to switch it off. It can also be an issue in the sense that if you click it too eagerly, you can quite easily cycle past the setting you want.
  • There are only 3 speeds, and no pulse modes.
I'm a big fan. Yes, it's comparitively simple compared to some of the more elaborate vibes out there at the moment, but I like that it's uncomplicated... Y'know, sometimes life doesn't need any more complications? It's a nice size too, and the packaging is stunning (Ok, I'll stop raving about that tin now!)
Want it? Buy it @ LoveHoney for £26.99 (price correct as of 07/08/09)

NK x P.S. - here's that packaging I was talking about:

Images courtesy of http://www.evolvednovelties.com

Tuesday, 4 August 2009

Day 35 in the Student Madhouse...

...And 2 of the housemates are trying not to hear the sound of me being spanked. In reality there was no Geordie voice over this morning, but there probably should have been. I'm not actually sure if either of them heard (they weren't in surrounding rooms) but it's not really possible to be spanked quietly is it? Well, if it is, it's fairly pointless as to really get a decent tingle going on, there is pretty much automatically an accompanying "thwack". The initial spanks felt divine. After some time, I turned over and R worked my clit and pushed two fingers inside of my wetness... Then, feeling him spread me open and vulnerable, I feel another spank land, this time on my pussy. Several strikes later and I could have screamed in pure, ecstatic pleasure. Seeing his cock at face level, I needed to taste it. To lick him and suck him. To run my tongue around the head, and down his shaft, and draw him into my mouth, finally feeling his member grow just that extra bit harder, and as he came, feel his load shoot into my mouth... Needless to say, I'm thinking I have found the secret to my enjoyment of giving head. No, not being spanked (though that is more than welcome, especially with how hot the pussy spanking got me), but feeling in control. Me controlling the situation made it erotic, enjoyable and best of all, orgasmic. So, here's to more situations like this morning. Many more.

NK x

P.S. I'm hoping to be back on tomorrow or so, either with a more discussion-y blogpost, or a review. Either way there'll be something soon :)

P.P.S Whoever bought me the Durex Pina Colada Lube from my LoveHoney Wishlist is adorable, and really cheered me up last Saturday when I received it. I needed cheering up that day too, so marvellous timing! And the congratulations on the grades from my exams, and good luck wishes for uni are also appreciated darling!

Friday, 31 July 2009

Hey folks! Just a quickie off me this evening, to let you know about what I recently got and will hopefully be reviewing on here soon...

I made a little LoveHoney order a while ago and got:

So hopefully some reviews very soon for those. I'm excited to try out the Dolphin as it seems really high quality for the price - silicone was once only for those willing to endure the hefty price tag! The LoveBunny was adorable, and I'm sort of curious about those ears, truth be told! As for the VibraExciter, I'm mostly looking forward to seeing my OH wind me up with it! I'm very tempted to go somewhere public and see how long we last before I drag him away somewhere to fuck his brains out... I also have a BIG box of goodies arriving tomorrow...

Over the next few days or so, I'll be hopefully getting at least 1 review out to you and also have a bit of a discussion blog I want to do as well... That's if all the above doesn't... er, get in the way, shall we say?

NK x

Monday, 27 July 2009

Feeling Unsexy – Dealing with it or working on it?


Today I received an unwelcome surprise from Mother Nature. Now this may be too TMI for some, but I’ll gloss over it, naturally! Essentially, Aunt Flo shouldn’t have arrived for her monthly visit till Thursday, but she unpacked her bags and settled in today. This has made me undeniably cranky, but on the bright side explains why I’ve been a bitch for the last couple of days! (What a relief, it’s not just me being mean!)

It makes me cranky partially because of the aches and pains that come with it (but between my mug of sweet, milky tea, a giant aero bar and my hot water bottle, I’m working on that!) but also because of the enforced lack of sex. I could do with a really good seeing to right about now anyway so this was really badly timed. *growls*
Look, my tea. It’s fixing me, so it is! And it’s not a bad mug either! ;)
I know some women are happy – or at least willing at the bare minimum – to have sex during their period but I am not one of them. Firstly, in all honesty, the mess would put me off. Secondly though, I am generally a bundle of “eugh” during that time of the month, and the last thing on my mind is sex (I have to admit, that’s the only time of the month I can say that!)
Now when you’re single, feeling like that isn’t a problem. You can curl up with a hot water bottle and wrap yourself in a duvet and almost forget about sex and the like for the week… however when in a relationship, it’s not always that simple. I’m not saying we owe our partners sex or that we are obligated; but it’s difficult if they are horny as hell to tell them where to go! That isn’t, however, to say I never have told him to sod off when I’m feeling horrifically unsexy, but I feel fairly rotten for doing it. I mean, I'm sure there are plenty of times when he's felt tired or lathargic and for whatever reason didn't feel like it - but has still done it for me?
Yes, handjobs and blowjobs are always an option at that ‘time of the month’ – but I find that’s when the whole “feeling unsexy” issue really bites you on the arse. When you don’t feel sexy (or at least this is the case for me), you don’t feel like you’re capable, and what’s more – in my case at least – I know I get irritated. I don’t mean to, really, I don’t. In fact I hope this constitutes as an apology!
Part of this though, could be my own quirk – as I have blogged about before I am naturally very much towards the submissive side when it comes to sex and any kind of BDSM play, nothing makes me happier than to be told (nay, ordered, ideally!) what to do, get pushed around, restrained, spanked etc… Except with one thing. Blowjobs. I have mentioned briefly before that I have issues with them (I think I have at least!) I believe my problems stem from my very early sexual experiences, where oral was the one thing anyone tried to force me into. It was pure luck that I’m damned strong and could tell him where to go. Don’t get me wrong here – I don’t count it as anything terrible I’ve “endured” or anything, but it’s given me certain issues. Being aware of such things tends to help though and being into psychology, my way of thinking tends to work within how I can alter my own schemas etc and thus make my mind interpret the situation differently. I hope to report progress very soon. I feel like I have some making up to do to my man.
With all that said, I am curious as to how women feel – do you try to do things you really don’t feel like for the sake of knowing there are times when you know he can’t be arsed/is tired and still does it for you, or do you go with the fact that you really aren’t in the right mindset for it? And as for their partners; do you feel like they should just get on with it or do you think it’s fair enough if they feel unsexy and generally “off”?

 NK x

Thursday, 23 July 2009

BDSM-themed musings...



I have discovered that reading example BDSM scenes is a bad idea, unless I want to get incredibly horny. No great surprise there, in fairness!

I was forumming earlier and stumbled across someone recommending a page on BDSM ‘for nice guys’ to another member, as she’d been having some trouble with getting her mr to indulge her in some BDSM play. I had a read through, and also of the other BDSM related parts of the site in question, and wanted to share it with you guys. I have to say, I found it very informative and would answer a whole heap of bondage-noob questions that I know I had at the start as well as making some interesting suggestions for a more experienced practitioner.

I would align myself as being somewhere in-between the two; I am nowhere near ‘experienced’ with it, however have definitely got past that initial stage of curiosity/nerves. Personally, I am very much a sub, and reading through that site reminded me of just how long it’s been since I was last restrained, tied up or similar… We even have new things in our drawer to try out but it hasn’t happened yet. One thing I am looking forward to doing is handing over the reins of a remote control vibrating egg I own to my mr some time soon, obviously in public. The thought of him teasing and controlling when I do and don’t get stimulation, and in a public place? Hot isn’t even the word. *fans self*

One thing that I think has hampered my getting more into BDSM with my other half is my lack of confidence. It annoys me no end when it strikes, but it’s something I’m conscious of and I’m working on. I’d certainly say I throw caution to the wind and just go for it so much more these days than ever before – and a great deal of that is having a partner who I know finds me sexy and also that I can trust implicitly – but I still need to allow myself to let go a little more. Ironic, in a way, as I do think that is why I am so naturally submissive, as it provides a release for me. I am quite a ‘big personality’ (I think that’s how you say it politely!) in everyday life, generally one to stand up and take charge of situations (though yes, horrifically indecisive) and thus being the opposite in my BDSM play provides a setting in which to be controlled and in that control, find a very real release. I find the whole scene odd though – I have always kept out of it as there’s something about the scene that... I don’t know… intimidates me, I think.

To be honest the people I’ve known who I am aware are part of the scene for it round here aren’t the best ambassadors for it at all. I also have always thought my natural insecurities and lack of confidence would be aggravated by the scene, hence my keeping well away from it. I guess in a strange way I’ve been loosely connected for some time though, was begged to do some bondage modelling a couple of years back, but at the time there was no way my confidence would have allowed it! In hindsight, it could have been an interesting experience, but I don’t regret turning it down, if only because I know I couldn’t have handled it at the time. Could have been a laugh though, and the money’s always handy! I would like to add a brief disclaimer to this post here – I am aware that not everyone on the BDSM scene are like the folk I have known, and I’m sure there are a lot of really cool people out there… But I am equally sure they’d still – intentionally or otherwise – intimidate the hell out of me!

NK x

Monday, 13 July 2009

a little hello...

Right now we’re still stranded internet-less. It’s terribly frustrating! We have our BT line going in today (that’s another contentious issue, the woman from the lettings agency said there was a line already in and active… but now we’ve had to pay out £122.50 to get one put in? Harrumph, I say) and then I’m calling our new ISP tomorrow to see about getting back online. Could be anything from 2-4 weeks, according to their website. Still though, we’re finding ways and means of entertaining ourselves. Currently, though I’m a little bored. It’s 11.40 am and I got up at like 9. Doesn’t sound like long I know but with no one else up the time does drag a bit it’s fair to say. The OH is still snoozing, and seeing as we’ve been routinely waking at 6am then only managing to doze after that (thanks, LL, for the paper thin curtains – they’re especially fun at the ‘sunrise’ side of the house – where our BEDROOM is… cheers, really*), I’ve gone for letting sleeping boyfriends lay. *we have seen some very sexy black and red ones, a damask style number… but due to our leaky wood (make your own jokes to that) above our window… well we’re not buying them only for them to get ruined… One thing I’m really loving about this place though, is the living with the boyfriend. There wasn’t much action for the first few days due to a visit of the Mother Nature variety, but we seem to be more than making up for it now. The other day, we ran upstairs for a quickie while we waited for our dinner to cook (very fun, and only got disturbed by one particularly puppy-dog-like housemate *after* we’d finished, which was handy) and then that night… blew my mind. I’m certain I’ve mentioned on here before that my buzzy butt plug is, in my opinion, a must buy for anyone who enjoys anal (must check once I’m back online if I have reviewed it yet – I have a sneaking suspicion that I haven’t) and that night only confirmed what I knew; if anything I’d say it was even better than our previous run with it… ah, I do love a good ass fucking. *sigh* Haha, I forgot to mention a particularly cringe-worthy incident that occurred on moving day… My boyfriend’s dad and sister helped us move (my move was over a 2 separate days, on the moving day itself it was just me, the essentials and the toys (didn’t want parents moving them for me, it felt a bit weird)) and all was going well. I’d been very thorough to go through my toys and take all batteries out of any buzzy ones… or so I thought. We’d got to the house and either my boyfriend’s dad or sister had brought through my bags from the car while I’d been busy doing something else (possibly having a nervous breakdown) and when I came to take one of them upstairs to ditch them, I felt a buzzing coming from my bag. “FUCK” I believe was my first thought. I tried not to let it show on my face and dashed upstairs to find the offending item – a bang bang bunny that I’d forgotten to slip the triple A's out of. FAIL! Not sure if they noticed, but I rather hope they didn’t! As a last note, ive bought the mr a present from LoveHoney. I haven’t told him yet – he knows I got something the other day and has asked but I keep refusing to tell him for the time being… I cant say on here yet as he is a member of LH and may indeed get to here (if you read this, not that im saying you’re snooping, just y’know… :P) so for the time being the pressie shall stay unnamed. I’m currently still a bit chicken to either ask him if he likes the idea, or just get it out and start using it. It’s pretty mundane to be fair, and diamonds – if you’re reading this I think you got one for your OH. (The thing you had to get replaced)The reason in my case why I got it was not only cause if I had a dick I’d want to try it (and for that reason, I think he may like it) but also because I have a few issues in bed. I’m not going to deny that and I have overcome so much in the time I’ve been with the mr but there are certain things.. well a thing… that still really needs work. (And not to get to psychological on you here, but I’m working on what I think is a very sound psychological theory that if I alter the situation enough, it won’t fit my schema, and I’ll handle things better (for one particular thing this is) hell, maybe even really enjoy it!) Right, I’ve blithered long enough at you! Hope to be back online soon, so I can see you all again and so I can post this!

NK x

EDIT – JUST FOUND I *CAN* USE MY MOBILE AS A MODEM FOR VERY BASIC ACCESS! YOU CAN HAS BLOG! YAAAAAY!

Tuesday, 30 June 2009

A quick update

Not a very focussed blog entry, this one - I can tell you that now! Bit of an update as I am moving tomorrow, and won't have intarwebs for 2+ weeks (might even be a month apparently - *sigh*). On the decidedly bright side, I am moving in with my gorgeous other half and am so so happy about that, so all is good really! Oh, and on a vaguely sex-realated note (and therefore on topic for the blog, lol!) any couple who is into anal action/dp needs this. I seem to recall hearing flatmates in halls walking past when we were using this.. he was fucking me while the butt plug buzzed away in my ass.. and normally we do get a bit 'eep' if it sounds like people are right outside while we're fucking... but i do recall, when he looked up upon hearing them, me declaring "fuck them!" at that point, it could have been the pope tbh. So yes, if you're into anal and/or dp, buy it. It also does a beautiful job of relaxing me enough so that he can fuck me considerably harder in the ass ;)

NK x

Sunday, 7 June 2009

Frustration 101

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH. Remember my rave about Dianette not so long ago? Well... Now I am far less impressed. Reason being, I have been plagued by Aunt Flo for far longer than normal, far more er.. imposingly than normal, and had the cramps from hell. All in all, meaning this weekend, last weekend and an impromtue visit in the middle to the Mr's were all incredibly frustratingly sexless. :( On the bright side though, I think Aunt is packing her bags as we speak, and as dianette is coming tomorrow evening, that should give her the boot out the door she so needs. Next weekend should be interesting, to say the least. Not only because I am now so achingly horny, so desperate to feel his cock inside me, that I may actually tear him to shreds, but also because we have my house to ourselves... My parents are on holiday ;) All meaning that he has even said he knows there is no point bothering to bring clothes for the Saturday! I'm considering trying a new purchase out with him... We do partake in anal occasionally; so i think the potential for it opening me up enough to allow for some nice, hard anal fucking would be rather nice... But then there's also the idea of how much I sense I'll be screaming when he fucks me when I have that in... Vibrations for both of us, and DP for me. Mmm...

NK x

Tuesday, 19 May 2009

A Little Pill Update

Hello folks!

Jesus, a whole month since I last blogged?! It cannot be!

Life stuff first - it's my birthday in 2 days - I'll be 21!!! I can't wait!

In other news, I have gone on the pill. I know that may seem an odd thing to share, but contraceptives are an important part of sex, unless you want to have nippers!

In reality though, the reason I mention this is more to do with my feelings about it and how I've found it thus far... Admittedly I've not been on it very long, butI thought I'd share my experience thus far. I am taking Dianette, btw.

My biggest concerns about it were the possibility of it making pre-existing depression etc flare up (I do have a bit of a history with that kind of stuff..) and also a concern that it could cause a loss of libido - I'd always said if either of those happened, id come off it pretty much immediately.. After all, the former is too important for quality of life and the latter is the whole point of me taking the pill anyway - sex!

I did a bit of reading about the pill in general and more specifically dianette on the intarwebs before starting them, and all I seemed to read was negative - people who found they got emotional or depressed, suffered a lack of sex drive, or a number of other things and for whatever reason, hated it... It was a little daunting but I pressed ahead.

So, what do I think so far?

I'm really happy with it right now! I haven't noticed any low mood kick in - if anything it's been the opposite! I'd say my moods have improved and Im feeling sunnier since I started on it. As for libido, my boyfriend commented that it 'certainly hasn't affected that!" - which I'd agree with to an extent... I'd possibly go as far as to say that this weekend just gone we had some of the best sex we've had, ever! I don't know if it's feeling secure in being on a reliable contraceptive, if its had some chemical effect and increased my libido, or if its just because i love it when he comes inside me (oh god do i love that, really...) but it's been amazing. If i'd known how good it'd be, i'd have done it ages ago!

Fingers crossed this holds up!

NK x

Sunday, 19 April 2009

Just a Quick Explanation of Absence.

A brief update from me, and annoyingly 'life-based' it is too... Recent low mood stuff seems to be spilling over into sex life right now, I feel so sorry for R, he must be feelinglike nothing he does is right - though I have appologised for it all and he says there's nothing to appologise for. I really am very lucky to have such an understanding boyfriend... But if nothing else, I'd really like this anxiety/mood crap to go so i can pounce on him <3 cause I'm actually rather fond of that... and right now, it's no good. :( A slightly :( post today guys. Better ones will follow soon enough, I promise.

NK x

Thursday, 16 April 2009

Ann Summers Rampant Rabbit Heart Throb: A Review

Good morning my lovelies. I have been bad. Again. (Hard to believe, I know, but bear with me...) You know how I said last time "Oh, I really can't afford any more new toys, the spending has to stop... yadayada" well that didn't exactly go to plan. I stopped at Ann Summers yesterday and bought the Rampant Rabbit Heart Throb. Now, I normally buy pretty much all my toys from LoveHoney (as you may have noticed), however what with the throbbing action being totally different to anything on the market, Ann Summers clearly saw that and patented it to themselves! I can't blame them, and I suspect any company would have done the same, but more on that later... On to my thoughts!
Things I Love about the Heart Throb: (1) I think the biggest thing has to be that the sensations are totally different. A big factor in why I bought it was because I thought about how I feel when I climax and right after, and I always do the whole contracting, throbbing, spasmy thing... I thought if there is a vibrator to replicate that, it has to be good. I'm also not always sold on a vibrating shaft, I sometimes get a little numbed by that so a different sort of shaft stimulation seemed like a good idea. (2)The material it's covered in is *gorgeous*. Really, it is. If you have a store anywhere near you, go and stroke one if they have models out to touch. It's possibly the nicest feeling vibe I've used in a long time! (3) Multi function rabbit vibrations; the rabbit bit (clitoral stimulator) has several speeds and pulses, not the ridiculously long list that some seem to go for these days, but equally better than the old low/med/high that the old Rabbits used to go for. Things I hate about the Heart Throb: (1) Now, you're warned about this on the box, so there is an indication it may happen, but... The throbbing action stops if it is gripped too tightly. Of course, that is likely- especially as you get closer to orgasm! I've found there is a level it can be pulled out to to get it working and still be pleasurable on me, but many might find this a huge problem. Yeah, just the one "hate"; but it's quite a big one tbh. I also really like that this vibrator doesnt really need to be pulled and pushed and thrusted or whatever like most - for me I find the throbbing action and clitoral vibrations are more than enough, especially with the multispeeds. Some people have said the rabbit is too flexible, or that the ears don't sit right... I did have a few positioning issues, but for me, all that really took to fix was spreading my lips a little more with my free hand... Which personally I find pretty erotic anyway, so it was hot enough to just feed into the whole thing ;) All in all, I don't know if I like the throbbing monopoly in the marketplace too much - the motor issues are probably teething problems with a new type of mechanism, but the easiest way to overcome that in any subsequent models would surely be for many manufacturers to be working on it, not one to be hogging it? I understand why they did it, don't get me wrong, but still. I feel like it's certainly new and different and something to be experienced... But I'm not totally convinced it's earned it's near-£50 price tag. A welcome newcomer to the toy box though. All things considered, I'm glad I gave it a go, but I do feel it could do with some work - so perhaps a Rampant Rabbit Heart Throb 2.0 could make me a very happy girlie?

NK x

Thursday, 9 April 2009

A Hole in my Pocket...

I dislike being so poor intensely. I had recognised my ever deepening lack of funds but I don't think it had really truely hit home till the other night when doing my sums for home much student grant/loan etc I'll actually get. It is terrifying, but I really need to try not to let that get to me too much, I know that. There are a few things bring a bit extra cash in (possible tax refund, and a couple of things I returned after buying that are going to get me refunds there too) but I'm still apprehensive. It does mean though, that I need to be sensible about NOT buying more toys for the time being. I'm starting to wonder if that really is like an addiction for me these days, I find it hard not to buy them! Sensibly though, there are a lot of toys in my toy drawer... And in boxes... And under my bed. Heh. I seem to be hornier than usual at the moment, running at an average of 2 wanks a day. Not that it's a bad thing, especially when I got the Lelo Mia the other day, and what with it being rechargable I don't have to worry about the batteries running out! It goes without saying though, that I'm pretty much dying to get to July and move in with my other half, sex on tap!

NK x

Monday, 6 April 2009

Come 'Closer'...

I find it interesting how our senses are linked.
Sex, obviously, tends to focus on touch as the most obvious stimulated sense, but stimulation of our other senses is what makes good sex become mind blowing sex.

Thinking about that, today I thought I'd touch (no pun intended there) on the topic of sexy songs.

Some songs are intentionally sexy, that's their whole reason for being. When it's done right, it can be pretty damn good - in the example (in my opinion) of NIN - Closer. It's unashamedly a slice of pure sex... Pure, raw, animalistic fucking, in lyrical form. Undeniably though, there are some that don't hit the mark... for the sake of my sanity, I won't go into them too much here!

My new obsession right now is with Kings of Leon "Closer" (which I swear is a total co-incidence on the track name!) It's said - online - that the song is about a lovesick vampire and I can definately go along with that- on listening to the lyrics it does sound remarkably vampiric. The whole feel of the song is so sensual, so erotic. It gets me hot, to say the least. (You might have noticed, heh)

I also have some that are less obvious - like Spitfire by The Prodigy (don't ask me - I think it's rooted in the soaring female vocals - maybe my mind's converting that to orgasmic screams?)

In fact, I just clicked 'play' on Closer (the Kings of Leon one) for about the 10th time this evening. I can feel my breathing getting deeper and my mouth getting dry... I suddenly become aware of my pulse and a longing to be ravaged and bitten...

http://www.last.fm/music/Kings+of+Leon/_/Closer (go, listen!)

NK x

LoveHoney Silencer: A Review

Click here to view my original review @ LoveHoney
My Silencer was waiting for me in an oh-so-discreet brown box when I arrived home yesterday. I grabbed the box and excused myself away to my room, immediately!
The now almost iconic LoveHoney packaging is always refreshing in comparison to some of the cringeworthy bimbo-clutching-boobs boxes that still linger out there in the industry!
Upon taking it out of its packaging, I noticed the weight of the toy. It is fairly heavy initially, more so once the two "C" batteries it needs are inserted. The weight is definitely a good thing though as it feels very solid and not hollow and cheap like some plastic vibes can.
Now, I turned to the Silencer as I live at home (with my parents) currently and needed to add a discreet option to my ever-expanding toy box.

The operation is very simple - multi-speed and controlled through a twist base. At its lowest level it is barely audible over the sound of a running computer. As you turn the dial and head for the stronger vibes, it does get louder and I wouldn't call it exactly a 'quiet' model on the highest level, but it is still quieter than many. One difference I did notice was on the removal of the card tube inside the toy - if it's taken out the batteries do rattle around quite a lot, however with them in place, this is reduced a lot.
One other noticeable difference noise-wise is that the sound is a much lower pitch than you might be used to from bullets and other wand type vibes, so that would help it be much less obvious!
It does what it says on the tin, so to speak, though obviously it isn't as all-singing, all-dancing as some newer models.
The only caveat I may add for vibe newbies is that this is "girthier" (as I like to put it!) than some other models, noticeably so as there isn't much taper at the tip. The rippled shaft, however, feels exquisite during penetration!
Pros Volume levels are lower than many, rippled shaft is excellent.
Cons Not quite as quiet as hoped, a little basic in functionality.
Bottom Line A good basic vibe, quieter than many, probably the quietest penetrative vibe around. BUY @ LoveHoney for £14.99 [price correct at time of writing]

NK x

Wednesday, 1 April 2009

Glass and more...

Hmm, two posts in the same month, this is getting to be almost like a real blog is it not? Haha. Anyway, I got a LoveHoney parcel through today. Yes, that does indeed mean that my idea of not ordering that I discussed in the last entry lasted all of about 2 minutes... In fairness though I chose well and my new pretties are lovely. I could have resisted if it weren't for the damn Deal of the Day which, on Monday, was to buy the LoveHoney Galaxy Orgasmic Glass Dildo and get the LoveHoney Starburst Orgasmic Glass Dildo 6.5 Inch free! Yes, two beautiful glass dildos for under £20? How could a girl resist? I also added the Lelo Mia to my order, and the Bang Bang Bunny. I even qualified for the Waterproof Ultra 10 Silicone Teddy Vibrator as a freebie. The latter, I'm not so sure I'll get much use out of - after all, it looks a bit little-girls-toy-ish to me. And not 'toy' in the sense it should be. More barbie gone wrong. Still, if it feels good you might hear a change of opinion coming (quite literally ;) ) from me! Anyway, back to the issue in hand. Glass dildos. I really think every girl should own one. Or four. (You get the picture!) The first one I got was from Sextoys.co.uk and was the Toy Joy Glass Worxx Crystal Pacifier. I like this one a lot, it feels great and started an ongoing love afair with glass toys for me. The other one (if you've been counting, you'll have noticed we're at three and I mentioned "four" just before...) is a glass butt plug, also from LoveHoney (which I have to mention, is NOT for starters no matter what they might say!). I say every girl needs to try glass is that it just feels equisite, and looks much more beautiful than any other sex toy around, in my opinion. They wouldn't look out of place as a glass ornament, they're that graceful and elegant looking. The other really cool thing is the way they conduct temperature - they can be cooled or warmed and that makes for great sensations. I'll be back later to tell you what I thought of the Lelo Mia too...

NK x

Monday, 23 March 2009

Popping my head back in...

Wow, I know I say this pretty much every time but it's been too long! I'll endeavour to be better, ladies and gents... I think that'll be much easier as the months progress.. for reasons that will become clear in the 'general life stuff' bit of this update! Okay, time for the aforementioned life stuff... College still progressing nicely... It can be a bit of a headache at times but I just have to remember that it is progressing and it is only a matter of time till it is done. Which makes me happy. Not that I hate college outright but the work we are doing seems almost insulting - university was amazing when I visited and I just want to be there now! Saying that though, my compulsory and pointless key skills type lessons end this week (or possibly next), one course ends in May and the other 2 in June. So I shall have progressively more time and be acting less and less like a headless chicken. What I am probably most excited about, though, is moving in July. We're sharing with friends, but it means me and the mr get to live together and I really can't wait! I have been lacking the funds to do much in the way of ordering from LH recently, which has been annoying to say the least, but I was looking the other day on some money saving forums about people "shopping from home" - meaning not buying new things and instead really looking at what they have in their cupboards and freezer, and using what they have... I think this logic can definately be applied to sextoys too. Over the coming weeks/months, I'll be going through the (sometimes overlooked) gadgets and gizmos I already possess and reviewing the ones I haven't already rated... Obviously, they'll get posted both here and on the LoveHoney website :) The only thing I have actually bought recently was the Hello Kitty Mini Vibrator which I honestly don't think I can possibly bring myself to corrupt... Very unlike me, I know. Though, then again... Who knows. Heh. Other things which I'll have to go into in upcoming posts will be my long overdue giving of head (yes, I was a blowjob virgin till a few weeks ago... no joke) and the book I just bought (and of course the free toy that's coming with it). I may even do a review of the shoes I bought (I only bought them due to a comment on the LoveHoney Forums...

 NK x

Thursday, 12 February 2009

Mmm

I've been too quiet for too long I think! Sorry guys and girls!

A little update on life in general firstly... College is still going well - more results from the latest rounds of exams gave me 2 more distinctions and a merit in the subject I was sure I had failed, so I'm rather pleased to say the least.
I don't remember if I'd mentioned it last time (or hell if I'd even had it then) but I've had an offer from the uni I want to go to, and since then I (and the others) have signed for and paid the deposit on our shared house we're going to live in! Scary news though - the contract is going to start quite a bit earlier than I expected - I had been thinking moving date would be mid September but now it is actually the start of July! It'll be alright though, and I can't wait to share a bed every night with R!

On the subject of R, I was over at his last weekend - as I do most weekends. Largely, the weekend was spent watching dvds, as is common for us. I haven't drank in quite some time though and recently decided to start drinking again - if nothing else, in readiness for my 21st, the summer (which will no doubt be an intoxicated affair) and the train wreck I will become in September/October... Yeah, you guessed - FRESHERS!

After our night out and spending some time at a friends, we got back over to the flat and naturally, the night progressed to much naughtier things... I haven't told him this (his ego is big enough, believe me!) but no man has made me cum as hard as I did when he fingered my ass and sucked my clit. It helps, I think, that he's not afraid to go for a little biting...

On the subject of biting etc though, I have two corkers on me at the moment, but the most impressive thing has to be the scratch and nail impressions on my back - they drew blood and still are bleeding whenever I scratch them! Oops!

Good though, bloody good...

NK x

A mini update

I've been too quiet for too long I think! Sorry guys and girls! A little update on life in general firstly... College is still going well - more results from the latest rounds of exams gave me 2 more distinctions and a merit in the subject I was sure I had failed, so I'm rather pleased to say the least. I don't remember if I'd mentioned it last time (or hell if I'd even had it then) but I've had an offer from the uni I want to go to, and since then I (and the others) have signed for and paid the deposit on our shared house we're going to live in! Scary news though - the contract is going to start quite a bit earlier than I expected - I had been thinking moving date would be mid September but now it is actually the start of July! It'll be alright though, and I can't wait to share a bed every night with R! On the subject of R, I was over at his last weekend - as I do most weekends. Largely, the weekend was spent watching dvds, as is common for us. I haven't drank in quite some time though and recently decided to start drinking again - if nothing else, in readiness for my 21st, the summer (which will no doubt be an intoxicated affair) and the train wreck I will become in September/October... Yeah, you guessed - FRESHERS! After our night out and spending some time at a friends, we got back over to the flat and naturally, the night progressed to much naughtier things... I haven't told him this (his ego is big enough, believe me!) but no man has made me cum as hard as I did when he fingered my ass and sucked my clit. It helps, I think, that he's not afraid to go for a little biting... On the subject of biting etc though, I have two corkers on me at the moment, but the most impressive thing has to be the scratch and nail impressions on my back - they drew blood and still are bleeding whenever I scratch them! Oops! Good though, bloody good...

NK x

Tuesday, 6 January 2009

Happy new year!

And here we are, 2009! I have no idea how that happened, frankly! I had the most amazing NYE. I honestly don't think I could ever have a better time. It wasn't anything fancy - a houseparty with my better half and his friends, who seem to have fairly well adopted me into their social circle :) It was a civilized bash, all red wine and soft lighting... (well, no wine for me but less said about my begrudging sobriety the better!) My new years kiss was with the man I love. Life is sweet. Life became even sweeter when we headed back to the flat for the first sexings of 2009... And my god, did the first session go with a bang.. There are worse places to be than handcuffed, legs spread and a certain someone's tongue working hard... I am also rather proud that I got over my toy issue and got intimate with my glass dildo for my man. That was very good.

NK  x