Wednesday, 19 December 2012

Review: Dreamgirl Black Diamond Plus Size Fishnet Garter Dress

I was sent the Dreamgirl Black Diamond Plus Size Fishnet Garter Dress for review by Lovehoney. I had meant to get this review up sooner, but shingles has kicked by butt!

This is the first garment of it's type that I have owned. Being a big girl, it's only really in the last few years I've started venturing into more daring lingerie as I have developed better body acceptance.

First out of the packaging, it looks tiny, in the same way a pair of tights look doll-sized before you get them on. Don't panic, with it being fishnet, that is to be expected and you'll be surprised how much it stretches and conforms to your body. This also means if you're going away for a night, it takes up barely any space in your luggage, which could prove to be very handy indeed.

First of all, this calls itself a "dress". Maybe on a slimmer girl you could call it that, but I'd say it's a lot closer to a body stocking, as it's made of fishnet. Speaking of slimmer girls, you'll notice the promotional shots I have for this are of a particularly slim woman. The pictures Lovehoney use are of a curvier, yet (in my opinion) by no means "plus size" woman for the "queen size" listing of this dress. I am presuming this is what Dreamgirl see as "larger".

Screenshot of Lovehoney's product page and model.

Now, as I am 5'11" and fluctuate between 22 and 26 depending on the outfit, I got the "One Size Queen", which is stated as fitting UK 18-24. I am aware that in terms of clothes size this should be the right size for me, but that in height I am outside the "normal" range of women by a couple of inches or so.

With that said, I found that the fit of the garment overall was much better than expected. The legs are long enough (near enough a miracle), nothing looks too short and everything I'd expect to be covered (or as covered as a fishnet body stocking dress will do), but the shoulders are a problem area. I have fairly average size shoulders for my overall build, but found that the shoulders on this slip, a lot. In reality, it's up to you to judge whether that'd bother you or if what else you might be getting up to at the time would distract you sufficiently!

Considering it is made of fishnet material, it's less scratchy and more comfortable than one might expect. I like the way it's all in one, as stockings and suspenders can be awkward to find in plus sizes.

In terms of where I'd wear it, I'd certainly pick it out for the bedroom. The design means you have the option to allow your partner very easy access and it's definitely raunchy. My partner said he found it very sexy. I could see this being worn to sex or kink parties, at least by the more daring attendees!

Overall, not the type of attire I'd normally pick out for myself, but something a bit different and provided you're comfortable with your shape, something I'd recommend trying.

PROS - Comfortable, sexy, small when not worn for easy packing.
CONS - Shoulders are a problem area for fit.
OVERALL - Mostly a good, if daring, choice. Shoulders will fall down.

The Dreamgirl Black Diamond Plus Size Fishnet Garter Dress is available for purchase from Lovehoney, who kindly sent me the dress in exchange for an honest review.

NK x

Tuesday, 25 September 2012

Toy with me Tuesday: Glass on Glass

We haven't lived here too long. The kitchen windows have a metal grate against them for security, but it's actually kind of pretty. Plus, glass toys are always beautiful, to me.

See more of this week's offerings:
Toy with me Tuesday

Sunday, 23 September 2012

Sinful Sunday: Cherries

This week we wanted to keep it simple.
I love this scarf. I love being tied. Simple. 

See who else is being sinful this Sunday...
Sinful Sunday

Monday, 17 September 2012

September Deals and Bargains!

This is something I'm planning to make a more regular feature; a round up of what's out there in terms of discounts, special offers and deals with some fantastic retaillers.

As the darker evenings draw in, what better time to snap up a few sexy deals to warm up the fun way? So here we have it, my summary of some of the hottest offers right now... 

Click here to visit Simply Pleasure
Simply Pleasure are offering two current discount codes this month:
15% off all orders of £30 or more [WARMER15OFF]
20% off all orders of £55 or more [WARMER20OFF]

All orders over £10 qualify for free delivery as always and they have some truly fantastic deals available such as the Rocks Off RO80mm bullet at just £3.45 - a staggering 70% off what I consider to be the best bullet on the market hands down! (Actually the entire Rocks Off Better Than Half Price Sale (including big hitters like the Rock Chick and Rude Boy) is amazing on price!)

Sex Toys UK are offering a deal tailored especially for 50 Shade fans; the Fifty Shades of Play bundle. Containing a pair of love balls, a blindfold, bondage tape and a paddle to experience some real-life kink. The toys normally retail at £56.99 total, but Sex Toys UK are currently offering the lot for just £25!

Lovehoney have LOTS going on right now...

10% off when you buy 2 items from the Bondage Boutique range
Don't forget all Bondage Boutique items come with their very own loyalty scheme!

2 for £30 on selected Seven til Midnight Lingerie
The sexy Seven 'til Midnight range is currently 2 for £30. The range includes gorgeous plus size pieces, of which I own a few!
All the books in the Fifty Shades trilogy come with freebies!  
*Note the free item on book 1 has been switched to a beginners vibrating finger ring.

Graduated from Fifty Shades? Get a Lovehoney 10 speed Dream Bullet free with In Too Deep by Portia Da Costa - worth £9.99!

I hope you all get some fabulous, sexy bargains as we head into autumn!
NK x

Sunday, 16 September 2012

Sinful Sunday: Never Naked

I'm never truly naked with my collar.

Master collared me early this year and I've worn this since. To be without it would feel incredibly wrong to me. It's discrete enough to wear day to day without suspicion or questions. 

In times of stress, worry or sadness, my collar is my link to him, to feel him near me even when we are physically apart. 

Click to see who else took part this week...
Sinful Sunday

Friday, 14 September 2012

Memories linger.

My mind keeps being drawn back to a not-so-distant memory.
A memory of a bed, and those within it.
The memory of how a kiss can echo throughout a person.
The way your moans channeled into my mouth.
How the early dawn light illuminated your body. 
I remember the feel of you.
I remember the taste.
The intake of breath at just - that - moment as he filled you so.
I remember how your breath felt on my cunt.
I remember finally giving in, abandoning my nerves and kissing you.

And I want it again.

I want you again.

NK x

Thursday, 23 August 2012

BDSM is Domestic Violence? Really?

I read today that a charity based not far from me is planning a "50 Shades bonfire" on the 5th November, and is calling for women to hand over their copies to be burned.

Reading the article, Clare Phillipson, who is the Director of Wearside Women in Need is quoted as saying: "I do not think I can put into words how vile I think this book is and how dangerous I think the idea is that you get a sophisticated but naive, young women and a much richer, abusive older man who beats her up and does some dreadful things to her sexually."

She goes on to label consentual BDSM as "domestic violence". 

I was appalled to hear the life I lead judged so harshly. I felt compelled to try to advise her of the reality of consentual kink and the relationships within it via the contact us link on the charity's site.

In my email I said:

Dear Ms Phillipson

I am writing to you to alert you to the offense caused by your statements to BBC news as published on their website here:

I am a lifestyle submissive woman in a D/s relationship. This is a relationship I entered consentually, and any and all activities carried out between my partner and I are fully consentual.

I greatly enjoy the pleasure I receive through these consentual activities.

To read these judgemental comments about a lifestyle many men and women in the North East are involved in was deeply offensive and disheartening. Most relationships in the kink scene are fully consentual and non abusive, but as with vanilla relationships, occasionally some do go bad. These women should feel they would be able to turn to WWIN, however I can say with some conviction I doubt many would after seeing the standpoint your organisation has taken against the lifestyle we lead.

I hope you will seek to enlighten yourself further to the healthy, fulfilling lifestyles others lead, and endeavour to make yourself more tollerant.


I do hope she will reconsider her standpoint, although my gut instinct says this seems unlikely. Should I receive a reply, I will post it here.

How do you feel seeing her take on the kinky lifestyle? Am I the only one who is shocked and disappointed? It really seems like kinky people, especially women, have less and less services we can use and be open about who we are and what we do. 

NK x

Consent: Not Optional.

Recently consent has been a hot topic in the fetish community. It is, of course, always of significance, but recently there doesn't seem to have been a day without someone else chiming in on the issue. Now for those who are on FetLife, I'm sure I don't need to go into the full background of recent accusations, and that's not what this post is meant to be about - I don't have a great deal to contribute in regard to communities I'm not involved in, and situations I have no knowledge of. Suffice to say I do think these discussions are important and abuses of consent always need to be challenged.

What I want to write about today is the application of consent.

So, you've been on the scene a while (maybe six months, maybe six years, who knows), and you're pretty confident you have it all down. You can debate everything from consent issues, to play styles, to edgier forms of kink with finesse.

And that's great.

But here's the thing. In all those discussions on why you need to ensure consent is given, did you actually sit back and think "Hey, this applies to me!"? Becasuse you damn well should have.

Consent applies to you.
Consent applies to me.
Consent applies to every single one of us.

It doesn't matter if you're especially "well liked" or well respected in the local "scene". It doesn't matter if you run your own parties or just attend. It doesn't matter if you're 18 or 80. It doesn't matter if s/he's your sub, partner or whatever-other-status. It just doesn't.

I'm getting sick of hearing of people brushing off consent violations. 

Unwanted touch MATTERS. Breaking limits MATTERS. Using deception or manipulation to gain "consent" MATTERS.

Just promise me this; the next time you're engaged in some kind of act (whether that be you physically performing an act upon someone, having them perform it on you, or commanding them to do something), sit back for a second and make sure you know, beyond reasonable doubt, that s/he wants you to be doing this. If you can, great. If you have doubts, check in and be prepared to stop right that goddamn second.

Trust me when I say being sexually pressured into unwanted acts, or being nonconsentually touched in any way, shape or form, stays with a person. It will colour their view of you, and worst of all, it might make them see themselves differently*.

NK x

*No one should ever feel guilty or responsible for that which was forced upon them, but many assualt survivors and those who have been in some way violated, do.

Friday, 11 May 2012

Review: Durex Love Box

I bought Waz and I a Durex Love Box each a few weeks ago. Since then, they've become a staple in our bags. We don't use condoms together but do so religiously when sleeping with others outside our relationship, both for STI protection and an extra layer of pregnancy protection.

We're not especially loyal to any one brand of condom, preferring to buy whatever appeals or is on offer at the time - provided it's kite marked of course - so what really attracted us to this product was the tins rather than the included condoms.

The tins themselves come in a variety of colours and styles - eight are offered at Lovehoney, styles are selected at random - which means for us as we have two different tins we know which tin is ours.

The tins are nice and sturdy so far, not showing any signs of damage. A big part of why we bought these was due to the fact that condoms kept in wallets or purses run the risk of damage over any length of time, so to carry some on us the majority of the time without that risk was a real benefit.

The tins come with three durex condoms in them already, and a small informational leaflet which explains more about the love boxes. Once this leaflet is removed, I have found up to five condoms will fit in the box - though this is highly dependent on brand and style as some (for example Skyns) are thicker packets. 

The bottom line is that I'd recommend anyone who uses condoms on a regular or semi-regular basis would benefit from the reassurance having your protection protected brings!

The Durex Love Box is available at Lovehoney for £3.49 and comes with three condoms.

NK x

Wednesday, 9 May 2012

Review: Lovehoney Bondage Boutique Wrapped Rattan Cane

We got this cane some time ago, in fact it was actually our first forray into the caning world! We selected the Bondage Boutique Wrapped Rattan Cane as our first cane for a number of reasons.

Firstly, it is an inexpensive item costing £9.99 and as it is from the Bondage Boutique range, every purchase means more stamps to stick on your card - which then becomes redeemable for free spankers (we recently claimed two free spankers of our own through the scheme).

Secondly, as we were (obviously) at the time totally new to caning we wanted something relatively simple, basic and unintimidating. Neither of us really had a basis for knowing what caning was going to feel like and as such, something fairly average seemed logical. We got it in black, though it's also available in pink.

Thirdly, it being a rattan cane wrapped in a "smooth plastic coating", we felt assured it would be fairly study and shouldn't splinter or break - something that has, thus far, held true.

So, in use? I am the submissive in our relationship and while I do admit I like pain, canes scare me a bit! There's a lot of flexibility to the cane, and this allows a great deal of control in the intensity of the strikes. At 27.5 inches in length, it feels long enough without being unwieldy and the 0.25 inch diameter makes it a moderately thick cane (the thinner the cane, the stingier, in general).

It does have a slight bend to it over time, though the extent to which your cane will do so is likely to have a lot to do with how well it is stored - keep it bend for too long and it will begin to retain the shape it's kept in.

We found it to be a great starter cane, but be aware if you're new to caning - in terms of pain and potential "ouch" this is a significant step up from spanking or flogging and with any real force behind it, it will leave red welts. I'd personally recommend a decent warm-up first (spanking, flogging and paddling all help) to allow for the caning to have a touch less shock to it. The only real negative to this cane versus the canes we have subsequently acquired is that this doesn't have any sort of handle, and the ones that do are probably a touch easier to handle, though the lack of one doesn't negatively impact the toy in a significant way.

All in all, a good basic cane I'd recommend - especially to those new to the art of caning. Not too pricey, unintimidating and from a brand I trust.

It's available from Lovehoney for £9.99 with free delivery.

NK x

Monday, 13 February 2012

Letter to Master

So, I suck at communication. I know I do, In fact, we both kind of do, but in many ways I'm worse. More or less because more little things will niggle away at me than will at Master, and I won't raise them. Occasionally, I do... but more often than not, they'll be squirrelled away somewhere in the back of my mind.

Master doesn't read my blog. I understand why he doesn't - he cites concern of it affecting my freedom in writing here. I get that - but in some ways, I wish he would.

I know it would be a... questionable method of communication. But right now anything would seem better than where I'm at. I worry about things and don't say anything. I try sometimes, but nothing comes out.

So Master. If you do see this, please understand I am happy for you to read. Partly because it's better than what I'm managing at the moment, but for a reason much more than that. Because I am yours, and my writing and thoughts are parts of me, so they are yours. Even my worst parts belong to you, though I may wish to change them and improve, they are still yours. There is nothing I could say here I would not want you to see, and that is not due to self-censorship. It is because I am yours.

NK xx

Wednesday, 8 February 2012

Agency (Philosophy/sociology): Yes, this is still a sex/BDSM blog. Honest.

I apologise now, as this post is largely being used as a way for me to work through the things currently in my head. If that will annoy you, feel free to click the little x up there. I wouldn't blame you. 

So, recently I've been thinking about the way I deprive others of agency; or at least refuse to acknowledge their own agency. In this context, I am using agency to mean
  • "capacity of an agent (a person or other entity) to act in a world".
  • "Human agency is the capacity for human beings to make choices and to impose those choices on the world"
  • ""agency" refers to the capacity of individuals to act independently and to make their own free choices"

So with the terminology out of the way, back to the issue. When I say I rob people of agency, or of acknowledged agency, I mean that for all a person could express an opinion, a position on something or similar, I will often deny it's truth, call them out on it or something along those lines.

I'm not just a generic douche, honest. The times I do this is when the person is expressing (either implicitly or explicitly) thoughts or opinions (generally of a positive nature) about me. Sometimes it might be about their happiness/comfortableness with a situation involving me, wherein I believe they are only doing it to satisfy me and will frame their words/actions as such - a cover up for what they really think.

Now, doing this to friends sucks. I know it's unfair, and it could even be said to be questioning their honesty. Worst of all though, is when I do it to my Master. Yes, even he doesn't escape the over thinking bullshit.

Recently, the object of this issue has been on our ever evolving non monogamy. We discussed this over the festive period and another "boundary shift" happened as a result - prior to that point, we'd agreed we both got to be with girls together and me apart (and perhaps him apart? I don't know - it's the kind of bridge that would have been crossed had we got to it)... I brought it up as I was having an ethical quandary with the situation - in that it was hetero-normative, phallo-centric and imbalanced. Now ultimately, the last issue... well if Master had said "That's how I want it", I'd have gone with it. He gets the final say and I'm happy with that.

We talked and he said he had been thinking about it, and really, it didn't make sense. That to him, it did seem unfair and illogical - what was the huge difference between PIV sex for me with someone else and him with someone else - or for that matter PIV sex and other forms of sex? Were we really enforcing the hierarchical typical "PIV is real sex, everything else is foreplay" logic here? If that was at play, truth be told neither of us were comfortable with it. And if that wasn't an issue then why was one form of sex, for one of us, banned with others? I could understand why he too had realised it was somewhat... silly?

So boundaries shifted, and all was well.

But here's where my issue right now comes in. Is he really okay with it? If it happened, for real, would he still be okay with it? I've got the "could this destroy us" jitters... And then I catch myself thinking that way and chastise myself. We're not that fricking fragile, I know we aren't. We've been together a long time and we're - if anything - stronger than ever. Becoming increasingly kinky, and increasingly "ethically (sexually) non monogamous" has if anything strengthened us as a unit.

Thing is though, when I do this even to him, I can't help but feel really bad. When it's directed to Master not only am I being unfair to him, I am also showing a level of disrespect that makes me feel bad. If Master tells me this is how he feels, this is what he is comfortable, why on earth should I question that? How can I question that?

Maybe there's more social conditioning in my head than I'd like. Maybe that's what it is? I guess what I need to do is talk... both to those I deny ownership of thoughts and opinions to, and to others who've experienced similar problems.

NK x

Thursday, 26 January 2012

Care in the Community

(Flickr // CC)

So I wrote here about how we recently attended our first fet event. During the event we played for longer (in a sustained sense) than we had previously, and I took a much longer, harder beating than normal - where new toys were also used.

I've read many times about the importance of aftercare to a submissive, and always appreciated the importance - at least for others. I'd never really played hard enough or found my way into subspace. The link there describes subspace as the state of a bottom's/submissive's/slave's mind during play, noting that "deep subspace" is often said to be a state of deep recession and incoherence.

Of course, that all changed on Saturday. Only afterwards did I realise how significant the scene had been, and how "out of it" I'd became. This, my friends, is why it helps a whole lot to at least have my Master there even if not playing!

During the scene, strapped to the cross, I remember "zoning out", feeling my mind move past the physical into a part of my mind I know I can only access through intense pain or meditation. A quiet place, and somewhere that doesn't feel affected by the outside world in any form. Looking back now, I can recognise that I was pretty far into subspace. Asked at what became the end of our scene if I wanted to stop, I remember trying to focus on Master and attempting to answer. "I... don't know..." was all I could manage. It was then, with the focusing issues and the way my legs had stopped supporting me properly that Master called an end to the scene.

Aftercare is something you read about a lot in BDSM/kink circles. I had never especially considered aftercare in relation to myself, nor had I ever expected to be the "kind" of submissive/slave that would need a great deal of aftercare. I look back now and realise that logic is at best flawed. There aren't "kinds" of submissives/slaves, and no-one can tell prior to play (unless you have prior knowledge) who will need aftercare. What I learnt is that aftercare is really all about listening to, and responding to the needs of your submissive/slave. While the wiki article is quite basic, I have read others online that detail the ways in which a sub/slave may react after a scene. For me, I was disorientated, and needed guidance on really basic things. I found I got the shivers/shakes and my temperature dropped. Knowing what I do now, i intend to keep a sugary drink on hand for post-play next time we play hard, and something warm to wrap up in. Something that was immensely helpful and comforting was the way Master told me how proud he was of me and that he loved me. The tenderness shown there penetrated to my very core.

I know I couldn't have handled being left on my own at that time. Being expected to stand would have been difficult, and had I not been given time to process and "recover" from the experience, I am certain my subdrop would have been significantly worse.

The bottom line is this; never think you know the extent of the aftercare you or your sub may require until the event occurs. Try to be as prepared as you can. Mostly, just look after yourself and those you play with.

NK x

Wednesday, 25 January 2012

Losing my fetish event virginity.

So, on Saturday I found myself, after much anticipation, at my first ever fet club night.

A little bit of history. I've been on the scene for a couple of years roughly, and FetLife for as long. I've known I was kinky for longer still, probably more like six years give or take. Over the last couple of years we (Master aka WazDakka and I) have been promising ourselves and others that we'll get along to a proper event "soon" continually. We made it along to a fair few munches over that time and met some great people on-scene, but never actually made it to a club night.

All that changed at the weekend. We arrived early to attend the rope club too, and WazDakka picked up a few new things to use on me... such as a knotless hog tie - maybe a risky thing for him to know, but it's certainly fun!

Once we got to the evening, we changed into our fet-appropriate clothes, and headed back over to the club from the hotel we were staying in nearby. I was in my PVC outfit - a corset style buckled top and a skirt - which I got a lot of compliments for, something I hadn't been expecting!

We spent a lot of time in the social/rope room and just chatted with others until a friend of ours arrived. WazDakka also got to buy a new flogger from another scene friend - or should that be fiend - who makes evil and sadistic items!

Eventually we ventured through to the playroom, my first experience of one, where I laid eyes on the furniture it contained. Our friend had been talking to a ProDomme at the event and had been offered some coaching in dishing out a beating. Somehow, in the middle of all of this, I got volunteered for target practice and found myself shackled to the St Andrews Cross. My first time in a dimly lit dungeon, restrained and I found myself the attention of not one but three sadists (or rather two, plus one in-training!) - a nervous experience to say the least!

I'm told the scene lasted about three quarters of an hour, though I couldn't tell how long we'd been in there at all. My arse and legs became intimately acquainted with all manner of floggers, spankers and canes (mostly from Master's toybag, a couple from our ProDomme friend) and tears did fall. After my legs stopped supporting me properly at all, WazDakka called time on the session - my fatal flaw as a slave is my stubborn streak that stops me safewording out even when I probably should. Ultimately though, it wasn't more than I could take - after all I'm still here now!

The heat radiating from my arse afterwards was amazing. We went outside for a post-play cigarette and found the cooling breeze incredibly enjoyable! The marks on me may look like nothing to many, but for my rhino butt it says a lot - it takes a lot to mark my rear! Sitting wasn't a bundle of fun, but did serve as a flinchy reminder of what I'd just experienced.

Warning! Herein lies a picture of my butt. If this is something you DON'T want to see, stop reading.... NOW!

Thursday, 19 January 2012

Testing, testing?

No, not testing the post, but rather testing me. Or at least certain parts of me.

I went today to the local STI clinic (aka GUM clinic) nearby. I should add at this point, that I don't suspect anything - this is a housekeeping task more than anything.

Not too long ago I got to thinking - I've been having sex for 6 years now, and never once have I been tested. I honestly think a lot of people could say the same - but the years, for many, will be higher. There's still not a culture of routinely getting tested in terms of sexual health, in the same way there is say, a culture for getting  a dental checkup twice a year.

I hope, in time, that changes. Because really, a lot of things can be dealt with easily when caught and caught early. But leaving issues for months or years is only going to jeopardise our own health, so surely this is a no brainer?

What I wanted to use this post for is to say that my experience wasn't scary. I wasn't judged. And no, it didn't hurt. I think the person most at risk today was the nurse who almost had a speculum fired at her due to my overzealous pelvic floor muscles. What can I say, I'm pretty strong in certain ways ;)

Seriously though; guys, girls and all the lovelies inbetween or elsewhere - today was fine. It was easy. Get tested. If you love sex, protect your ability to keep having it, and look after yourself.

NK x

Friday, 6 January 2012

It's been too long.

It really has.

I've not posted in months, and in those months a lot has happened. I'm not going to try to give a full account of everything, but I think at least a once-over is in order...

Since I last updated on the matter, there's been a fair bit more boundary-shifting for WazDakka and I. We've been through our first involvement with another person as a couple. She was a friend of ours, married, and had always been mono up until that point. Her husband had given her "permission" to be intimate with a girl, which was relatively quickly assigned to be me. Now there was also attraction there between said friend and WazDakka - so permission to play was given there too - but with a caveat of no PIV to take place (which, WazDakka being the honourable type it never did). Under these rules and restrictions the three of us had a lot of fun.

You'd be forgiven for wondering why the use of past tense if it was so good. The problem, at least in part, for us was her husband. Certainly for me at least. He had no interest in seeing his wife and I make out (fair enough, his choice) and was if anything noticably uncomfortable about it. That much didn't take a genious to work out. So WazDakka and I backed off. We're still great friends but while he's [her husband] so clearly not happy with the situation, it'll be staying platonic.

Since then there haven't been any more girlies in my life. Which pretty much sucks. A few things could be on the horizon, but we'll wait and see what pans out.

Perhaps more significantly, we discussed the ethical issues I was having with our arrangement the other night. I felt it was iffy at best that he was allowed to fuck women and yet I wasn't allowed to fuck men. It's not so much that I actively want to fuck other guys, but the contradiction seemed unfair. Don't get me wrong, WazDakka is my Master and ultimately what he says goes, but having a discussion about my issues on how close to a OPP it came seemed sensible.To elevate PIV sex as more significant than other forms of sex riled my queer rights-ness, and to logic that I might get swayed away by something as insignificant as a cock when the rules layed out afforded him such "tempting" sex seemed crazy.

His reply, however, surprised me. He said he'd been thinking about it recently, and that it was stupid, really. And that life is short, and his thinking had altered, opened up, to the idea that it really wasn't that significant. So if I wanted - with our normal caveat (that the additional person must not be a douchebag) - I was free to enjoy the "company" of guys.

Sure enough, each of our FL profiles were updated, with the both useful and respectful expectation that any guy is to be vetted by my Master WazDakka, and that as such they are to contact him. Within a couple of days, we had a message. Not yet sure about that one, but that's for it's own reasons.

So, what are we? We still don't really "identify" as poly, though we're not opposed to additional relationship(s) forming if they feel right. We're sure as hell not mono. We're us. That's about as much of a label as we're going for right now.

And with that I'm aware that was a very long post. So if you got that far, here's a boob shaped reward:

NK x